Hear from Jaime, a seasoned wilderness guide and upcoming Men’s ReWild Retreat leader, what it means to rewild yourself as a man, and how rediscovering your true nature can help to transform your life. From understanding the four facets of wholeness, to working with childhood wounds and trauma, Jaime helps to unlock barriers for men and understand the deeper purpose behind doing the inner work.
Jaime, a seasoned wilderness guide and director of the charitable trust The Centre for the Great Turning, has spent years developing powerful ways of working with men of all ages, supporting them through the key stages of life. His unique approach blends rites of passage, grounded meditation practices, music, and embodied movement.
“Unless it’s in the body, it’s just a rumour. Talk is cheap. If you want to change unhelpful patterns of the mind, shift the body postures — it works,” Jaime says.
What inspired you to work with men?
My work with men began when I was a school teacher running a special boys-only class. I was teaching about sex, sexuality, grief, drugs, and all the alluring temptations young men face. Around that time, Celia Lashlie was running the Good Men’s Project in Nelson, which inspired me greatly.
The real spark, though, came when I began working for the Rites of Passage Foundation. I saw how transformative a rite of passage could be — not just for the young men and the emerging young leaders, but for their fathers and the older men who came along. These were good men who faced their fears and spoke, sometimes for the first time, about their tragedies and triumphs. They all loved their sons deeply, and it moved me. I went on to spend the next three years researching what was happening as part of a Masters Degree under the mentorship of two wild courageous men.
That was a decade ago and since then, I’ve been developing retreats, movement explorations, and other encounters for men. What keeps me inspired is this: underneath the bravado, the banter, the masks and personas, there is a stream of goodness — a deep desire to put energy behind something wholesome. I’ve been in a men’s group for nearly a decade. Yes, we bump. Yes, we get confused. But overall, we are good men with the capacity to help and serve. I love it when the wild authentic self bursts out of a man who has been quietly and thoroughly stuck.
What does it mean to ‘ReWild’ yourself as a man?
To me, in my early fifties, in a male body, Rewild means unearthing my vitality — that creative potency we all carry. It’s transforming a lifetime of cultural conditioning to conform into a life of creativity and freedom.
It’s reconnecting with the instinct that knows what is wholesome and what is not. It’s a doorway back to wonder and authenticity — and I believe those two qualities are the ground from which deep imagination and intuition grow. These skills bring richness, gratitude, and resilience. They help me stay creative in the face of adversity. I value this deeply.
The Four Facets of Wholeness
This framework comes from a mix of my own experience and the work of depth psychologist Bill Plotkin. The four archetypes of wholeness are:
- The Wild Indigenous One
- Soul Muse
- Sacred Fool / Trickster / Innocent
- Nurturing Generative Adult
These facets are like inner capacities that support psychological and physical health. They are the foundations for doing the ongoing work of becoming a true adult. They can also serve as a diagnostic tool — showing where we’re strong and where we might need to grow.
The Wild Indigenous One
He’s connected to nature and feels at home in the wild. He knows, without question, that he belongs to the Earth. His primary intelligence is his feeling body. He uses it to sense what he and others need. He’s connected to his life-force, no matter his age. He’s grounded, present, and likely to have a twinkle in his eye.
The Nurturing Generative Adult
He can self-care and self-regulate. He listens deeply, with the ears of the heart. He supports others. He understands self-awareness and uses it to know himself. He can sit in discomfort and hold the tensions of opposites. He’s the elder within — with access to wisdom — and is maturing his psyche to serve others and life. This is the essential skill of being a good parent to yourself.
The Soul Muse Beloved
He courts the ‘Mystery.’ He pays attention to dreams and symbols. This facet often awakens during a midlife crisis or opportunity. He/she holds the keys to what some call our mythopoetic identity — the unique gift we’re born to embody. Not everyone reaches this place; as Bill Plotkin notes, our culture doesn’t make it easy.
The Innocent Sage, Trickster, Sacred Fool
He’s a shape-shifter, able to turn a situation upside down. He doesn’t take himself too seriously, which allows him to transform deeply ingrained patterns. He knows life can be heavy, but he can also slip through the cracks and move lightly. He can speak truth to power, sometimes with eccentricity or even a hint of madness.
Each of these archetypes has both light and shadow. The work is to embody their wholesome aspects and bring them together into a balanced whole.
Why do communities need men to do the inner work?
There are many reasons.
First, young men need models of mature, balanced masculinity. Many are disillusioned with what the world offers them. They’re aching for connection and apprenticeship with authentic, loving men who still carry their spark — men who act from wisdom, not trauma or conformity. Men who aren’t fooled into thinking consumer culture can give lasting happiness.
Second, inner work improves relationships. As men grow more self-aware, they see their needs more clearly. They notice when they give away their power. They catch themselves projecting old hurts onto others. This path isn’t easy, but it’s empowering. It reclaims the energy once wasted on drama and misery.
Finally, inner work is vital for the Earth community. It reconnects us to our sovereign power and helps us choose what brings beauty and ecological integrity. Once we awaken to the interconnectedness of all life, it’s harder to turn a blind eye to environmental destruction. We begin to feel our bond with both our ancestors and future generations and our actions take them into account. This is the path to becoming true adults and elders.
As the old Irish say, “Before you give a man a sword, teach him how to dance.” Teach men about themselves before giving them power. As I’ve heard it put, “The ego makes a lousy master but a wonderful servant.”
What are the the biggest obstacles for men?
The first is themselves. Without self-awareness, there’s no choice. Awareness lets us notice when we’re hijacked by old wounds, generational griefs, or childhood pain. These need integrating. That doesn’t mean we have to relive every wound, but we must take responsibility for how they shape us. Once we do, we can step off the train of inherited patterns and choose differently. That’s power.
The second is our culture. We’ve been sold the story of infinite growth on a finite planet. The most common and unfortunate absence of a meaningful rites of passage brings us into the addictive dopamine rushes of a consuming culture. We’re taught how to earn money and fit into the economic machine, but not how to mature through life stages, manifest our gifts, or love deeply. My take on this is that as men we have a vast capacity for love and we tend to have an ability to get things done which is wonderful when the project is heading in the right direction.
Written by Jaime Howell
To learn more about Jaimes mens retreat, click here.
